Karma is a itch when it bits you in the Asp
by mandymld
Summary: Sam has a really bad twenty four hours. Seems like everyone is trying to kill her. In the end it is all a dream or is it? Most definitely not Sam friendly. Came from a challenge of how to kill her off.


Okay, what follows is the result of a bottle of Merlot and rereading Tuesday Morning's spoiler thread. Please be kind. The opening scene is hard on the stomach, but it doesn't go very far.

Karma is a Biotch when it bites you on the Asp

Letting herself into the penthouse with the keys she lifted off of Spinelli the night before, Sam tossed her coat on the desk and placed her overnight bag on top of it. Checking to make sure that her girls were just barely covered by the corset, she smirked recalling the incredible expression on Jason's face the last time she had worn this over here.

She knew by the look on his face that he was thinking how he should have never let her go and had been hoping they would get back together, but with the beauty and the geek returning, he had sensibly backed off. Instead they had sat on the sofa listening to Spinelli and Maxie going at it and she just knew that he had to have been recalling when that had been them, even if it had been the wrong room.

Tiptoeing up the stairs, she stood holding the handle to the door to Jason and her old bedroom and put on the five inch heels. Opening the door just enough to slide in, she saw Jason asleep his lower half tangled in the sheets. He had never slept that late when they had been together, poor baby, he must be working so hard.

They had only been back from Mexico a little over a day and Sam had been eager to finish making the connection that had started while they had tracked down the kids. When Jason had checked her face to see the bruise, she had seen the far away look in his eyes and knew he was remembering their time together.

As she glanced around the room, she was happy to see that he had replaced the furniture, she didn't like the idea of sex with him after that tramp Elizabeth had been using their old stuff.

Seeing the tent in sheet was barely covering him, she was ecstatic to realize he already had a hard on and could feel her insides throbbing at the idea of covering him and taking what they both had needed for so long.

She was crossing the room when she heard him mumble something, and stopped long enough to see that he was slowly waking up. The smile on his face as he came awake; made her decide to remove her wet panties and just mount him while he was in that half life between awake and asleep.

Climbing onto the foot of the bed, she was straddling his knees slowly working her way up to the top of the mountain, when she heard his groan lustfully and knew that he was hers.

"God, Elizabeth, not again, I can't believe I am not even interested this time, I never thought I would be saying that when it came to you. The mind is willing; baby, but the body can't handle another round."

Seeing that he hadn't woken up Sam leered at the exposed body, Jason must have been recalling some night he had been with that skank Elizabeth, his hard on was already disappearing.

Sam was so intent on Jason she never heard the sound of the shower being turned off as she went to move her hand to try and get a rise from her man.

After they were back together, she had every intention of making Elizabeth Webber pay for each time she had had sex with Sam's man.

"YOU CRAZY BITCH, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?" Sam froze and turned around to see Elizabeth Webber standing there in nothing but a bathrobe. "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY HUSBAND, YOU TRAMP!"

Jason woke up and saw a sight no man wanted to see on his honeymoon, Sam McCall sitting on his bed half naked in a trashy set of underwear. "What the hell?"

Sam stood and went to face Elizabeth, "What are you doing in our bedroom? Are you so pathetic that you have to come over here and beg Jason to take you back to bed?"

"If I remember right, it was me doing the begging." Jason said idly. "First to you to marry me, then for you to let Robin and Patrick keep the boys so that we could spend the night together alone."

Sam spun around, staring at the man lounging in bed and having what looked like eye sex with the tramp in their love nest. When he lifted his hand to rub the sleep out of his eyes, Sam saw the wedding ring and turned with narrowed eyes to Elizabeth when she spoke again.

"I do seem to recall some begging but I think it was me after the eighth or ninth round. Let's see, the pool table, the kitchen counter, the washer, stairs; no that was you begging me not to stop."

Jason continued on "Okay, the door to Spinelli's room, the showers, the bathroom sink, wait; you were begging when I stopped in the middle to grab a towel to place behind your head. The look in your eyes certainly seemed like begging, and then there was the first two times this morning.

"Excuse me, you also did do some begging there, but that was mainly about not using a condom." She said with a wicked grin at Sam. "We decided we want to have another baby, hopefully a little girl this time."

"I'm sorry, Sam. Does our talking about girls remind you of the child you lost with Sonny, I am soooo sorry about that." Said Jason as he stared at the woman he had let into his life. She didn't know it but Jerry Jacks' game had had a purpose, one he had mailed to Jason before his disappearance. Sam was going to pay, slowly and painfully.

Sam reached for the door way and rushed into the hall running into Maxie who was leaving Spinelli's room. "Damn, what got into Jason last night, I mean I know what got into you, I had no idea he had that kind of stamina and all those I love yous, I was thinking about taping it and sending a copy to Elizabeth Webber with a note saying eat your heart out loser."

Spinelli reached his doorway, and when he saw his partner, he covered his eyes, shocked to see her wearing no panties. "Fair Sam, I am happy for you and Stone Cold but could you please not show us your goodies."

Jason came out of his room, his arms crossed as he glared at the threesome. "Spinelli, we need to talk. Maxie, could you help Miss McCall put her underpants back on."

Maxie and Spinelli's mouths fell open when they saw Elizabeth standing in the doorway holding them out on the end of a thermometer. Maxie was on automatic pilot when she walked across the hallway until she saw the rings on Elizabeth's hand and the matching one on Jason's hand that was on her shoulder.

"Spinelli, I want you downstairs in ten minutes, we need to talk." Was all Jason said before pulling Elizabeth back into the room and slamming the door. The sound of laughter and giggles coming from the room got the remaining three moving; Sam took her panties and slipped then right back on.

Tripping her way down the stairs as she swore revenge on the newlyweds, she slipped and fell going head over heels down from the second landing, lying there with her legs wide open as she recovered from the fall.

Carly walked into Jason's penthouse and tossed the key on the desk covered with what looked like Maxie's mess and turned to see Sam, laughing she said "You have got to be kidding me, get up, get dressed and get the hell out of here."

"Let me guess, you are here to wish the happy couple well." Sam snapped as she gathered her few remaining ounces of pride and tugged on her light summer jacket grabbing her bag from the desk.

Carly just raised her eyebrows, and then as soon as she was gone, called over to see if Elizabeth Webber was home, she wanted to stick it to the little twit. Leaving a message that said "I just arrived at Jason's place, Sam was leaving here a little tousled, it's too bad you are too much of a coward to hold onto a real man."

Hearing footsteps, she saw Spinelli coming down followed by Jason who just ordered the geek to sit on the sofa. "Jason what was so important that I had to be here right away."

"Sit next to Spinelli." He ordered. "Elizabeth and I got married last night." 1… 2…. 3…

The stunned expression on both of their faces gave him the time he needed to wait out their outburst. "But what about fair Sam, I thought you were reconnecting with your true love…"

Turning to Carly, Jason said you will get your turn in a minute. "Spinelli, I have no idea where you got that idea, but Sam was useful in a few situations where I didn't want to endanger anyone I cared about, that is all. Do you really think I would forget that she hired men to hold a gun on Elizabeth and my sons, or that she kept her mouth shut about the kidnapping?"

"But?" Spinelli was over taken by Carly' rant of she did what?

"A little louder, I don't think they heard you on the docks." Snarked Maxie as she sat down in the chair. "'Sides, it's not that big of a deal, the brats are back home."

Sam snuck back to the doorway, needing her keys that must have fallen out of her coat pocket, she eavesdropped when she realized they were talking about her.

Jason took note that Maxie didn't seem surprised by the news and knew that he now had one more person to add to his list.

"There are no buts. Sam is not now nor will she ever be a part of my life. She was a mistake from the beginning. I never really loved her; it was obligation that I tried to turn into something more out of pity for that baby she kept throwing in my face. The simple fact is that it wasn't my child, it was Sonny's. I had thought I finally had a chance at fatherhood and she was there ready and willing."

"But that is all it was. There was no grand romance, this idea you have of romantic gestures, those were things that Carly told me to do or that Sonny suggested. I just wanted to stop her pity party."

Sam stepped back, furious and taking off the shoes ran down the stairs, how dare he denigrate their love.

Carly was ecstatic, "About time you grew your balls back."

"Too bad he gave them to that wimpy Elizabeth Webber instead of a real woman." Snapped Maxie.

"Fair Maxim…" Spinelli was embarrassed by his lady love but Jason was just furious.

"Maxie, you have ten minutes to go upstairs and gather anything of yours that is in MY PENTHOUSE, and get the hell out." Jason said then turned to Spinelli. "You have a choice to make, her or living here."

Stunned, Spinelli was torn between the love of his life and the man he owed everything to. Jason decided he had taken too long and announced. "Your stuff will be packed by a couple of the guards, I will arrange for a room at Kelly's. Good luck."

Sitting there staring like fish out of water, Spinelli numbly got up and went to get his laptop. He didn't get what had just happened here.

"Is she telling the truth, Maxie I mean? You really got your act together and went after your son's mother?" said a shocked Carly and now worried about the message she had just left on Elizabeth Webber's machine.

"No, I went after the woman I have been in love with for years, who just happens to be the mother of my son." He corrected with a smile that turned into a frown. "From now on Carly, you need to respect my boundaries."

"Same thing; back at you. We need to talk about Michael and what had happened. Jase, take care of your own family and let me deal with mine. For the first time in my life, I am strong enough to do so." She insisted. "Go be overprotective of the muffin and her kids."

Looking at his friend, he knew that the time had come to cut the strings that had been binding them for so long and said "I intend to. Carly…."

"I know, knocking before entering, not calling all hours, no longer expecting you to be there for me. I get that, good luck." She said getting up to leave, seeing Elizabeth coming down the stairs, she said "Take care of him."

Going over to kiss her man, Elizabeth said I intend to.

Sam hit the streets, still wearing the outfit from the strip club and heard the sound of a honking horn. Turning she saw a man leering as he leaned over and said "Fifty bucks for an around the world."

"Go to hell, I am worth so much more than that." She said through her tears, trying to reassure herself that she was past hooking for a living.

"With the bags under those eyes you should be paying me, plus you look a little more used up than most of the women I hire."

Holding up both her middle finger, she swore vengeance as he sped away, "Who the hell does he think he is?"

Arriving at GH, she snuck into the file room waiting until Elizabeth arrived at work; the woman had been wearing scrubs that morning at Jason's so she was sure she would be here soon. Seeing the drawer sticking out, she was idly going through the files when she saw a name and file that shocked her and decided on a different course of revenge.

Taking down the number, she used the cell phone held in her breasts to call Kelly Lee and make an appointment. "Yes, I have been working with someone over at Mercy, since the remodeling job here."

Sighing the doctor said okay, come on in. Receiving the number, she went to retrieve the sperm and made a few notes in the file.

Sam debated on where to stick the file and decided to place it in Emily Quartermaine's, since she was dead there was no reason for anyone to come looking.

Thanking her foresight to get a hormone shot before going to sex up Jason in hopes having a child with him, Sam knew that this way, she was going to be guaranteed his son or daughter. Take that Elizabeth! She thought as she followed through on her appointment with Dr. Lee.

Afterwards, Kelly said "I was surprised to learn you were going to be the mother, but I hope it works out well for the two of you."

Sam smugly said "Oh it will, I am going to have everything I have ever wanted."

"Well, I know that the father is going to want to be completely involved with the process. You wouldn't think it, but he truly seems to want to a good father, strange considering his profession."

"Professions have nothing to do with being a good daddy." Said Sam as she rubbed her tummy while imaging the sperm connecting with her fertile egg.

"Yes, but most people that know him, wouldn't think so." Said Kelly to Sam's annoyance at the idea she knew Jason. "When he came to me, I was shocked, but I do agree, Coleman will be a good daddy."

Sam turned white, and then felt her knees weaken. Looking at the file on Kelly's desk, she waited until the woman had left to return the frozen vials and read it. Mitchell Coleman Sample #14875 under Jasam Mogran. Screaming, she got out of the hospital gown she had on and got dressed in her corset again.

Hurrying down to the pharmacy, she begged the woman in charge for the morning after pill only to be told she had to go to a chain pharmacy. "We don't carry that, one of the hospital benefactors dislikes the idea except for in rape cases."

Carly was early for her appointment with Kelly Lee and saw Sam rushing down the stairs, trying to get out of the way; she accidentally pushed the con woman down the stairs. When she landed on top of Claudia Zachara, Carly just kept going admiring the mental picture of the two hos lying tangled in one another.

Claudia pushed the small annoying one off of her and laughed at the outfit "Who the hell are you supposed to be? Little ho peep? Where are the staff and the sheep?"

Spinelli rushed up to his partner and was helping her up when Claudia remarked, "Oh, here come the sheep now." As Maxie joined them. When she got the gist of what they were telling the tramp, she laughed and said "Who knew that Morgan had the balls to toss all you spongers out of his place.

"'Bout damn time. Spinelli, you are what, 22? Your girl friend, I am not going to even touch why she shouldn't be hanging around there. As for the ho peep, I have heard enough stories about you to know that Morgan pitied your ass and you used that to set on his couch doing absolutely nothing like you had a divine right to be there."

Seeing the sputtering she said "Oh, please. Sam McCall, Ric told me all about your romp on your mother's floor, so how was it? From what he said you weren't that good, he compared you to your own mother, saying that after a thoroughbred like her, it had been hard to get the blood to flow south for an old nag like you."

Sam shook Maxie off her arm and saw that there were others in the ER like Lucky Spencer who from the looks of things had just dropped the boys off to the daycare and Monica Quartermaine in scrubs and decided to go for some revenge.

"Did Ric also tell you that Jason Morgan has a weakness, he has a son? Lucky Spencer is playing daddy to his kid. Though not after last night, Jason married the whore to get access to his child. See Elizabeth was refusing to let Jason have any contact with the kid until she got a wedding ring."

"YOU lying bitch." Said Lucky. "There is no way Elizabeth would marry that lowlife."

"Actually Lucky…." Said Nik coming into the hub, wishing he had gone looking for his little brother the night before. "They did get married, last night. The rest of the venom she is spewing is a lie, but that is the truth."

Lucky stormed out planning on confronting his wife and the man who had always wanted her. Getting into his car, he revved the engine and hit something on his way out of the parking lot. Never slowing down to check on the body that hit his windshield he drove out into traffic and was hit by an oncoming medical waste truck.

As the police arrived, Mac saw the brightly colored fabric and went to pick it up and saw that it was Sam McCall. Calling into the hospital, they soon had a gurney outside to pick her up and get her taken care of.

Patrick had the broken arm set and told the woman that she would have a ringing sensation in her ears until her hearing came back, but didn't insist she stay in the hospital.

Rushing off to her apartment, Sam took in the beautiful day and decided a soak in the hot tub would clear her head. Settling in, she never saw the man slipping up behind her and strangling her with her own bikini strings.

Jerry held them taunt, then released them well aware that Morgan's punishment would be worse than anything he could come up with. Deciding on having a little more fun before heading out, he crossed the wires and let the hot tub give her an electrical shock for just a few minutes.

On his way out the door, he turned and smiled when he saw that she was just coming to in time to see him. "See you later, sweet Sam."

Furious with the bastard, Sam called Jason, sure that he would come to her rescue when he heard who was in town only to get the message that the phone had been disconnected. Getting dressed, she rushed over to the coffee warehouse and asked Sonny where he was.

"I haven't seen him this morning." He said his eyes following the wet spot on the front of her blouse. "How about you wait until he arrives? I am sure we can find something to do while I try to remember where he is."

Sam saw his eyes looking at her chest and sighed, well it wasn't like she hadn't gone there before. Slowly unbuttoning her shirt, she teased the man until he was raring to go. A quick ten minutes later, Sam told the dead weight to get off of her. Feeling the stickiness between her legs, she grimaced but wasn't worried, she had every intention of taking the morning after pill that very day.

"Sonny, come on, get off of me." She said trying to move out of the awkward position, but she was pinned to the desk with him lying on her back.

"This isn't funny, damn it!" She said then hearing the sound of voices arguing out in the hall, she prayed to the love gods that they didn't enter, only to find out that the world was against her when Olivia, Kate and Johnny Zachara entered the office.

"Oh my god, what did you do to Sonny?" called out the shocked voice of Olivia while Kate sat down stunned at the tawdy picture in front of her. "Sonny, come on, stop playing dead."

Johnny had an idea and went over to touch the body. "Uh, Olivia, he isn't faking. Sonny doesn't have a pulse. Someone call 911."

Sam felt the tears falling down her face as Mac arrived with Det. Harper and her own mother. "Samantha, what the hell is going on?" she called out then hearing Kristina and Michael's voices, tried to stop them from entering the room.

It was too late, as they saw their father with his silk boxers hanging at his knees and an apparently still hard part of him still inside the skank.

Mac asked the Zachara punk why he hadn't moved the body only to be reminded that he was on probation and could go to jail for tampering with a possible crime scene.

Alexis got the two teenagers out of there while the coroner and his assistant removed the body off and out of the embarrassed woman who refused to answer any questions and fled as quickly as possible.

Carly and Jax arrived and were sickened by the explanation. "Where did she go?"

"I have no idea. Lainey Winters is over there talking to the kids, I can't believe that Sonny would do something as stupid as sleeping with Sam knowing that Jason and her were getting back together."

"Where did you get the idea that was going to happen?" demanded Carly.

"Sam last night. She said that things had been resolved in Mexico."

"The only thing I resolved was that I wasn't going to spend another day apart from the woman I loved." Said Jason as he walked up with Elizabeth. "Elizabeth and I went to see Father Coates as soon as she got off work last night."

Alexis felt sorry for her daughter, but then looking at her middle child who was mute as the result of shock again, didn't feel too bad for her.

Sam ran into Queen of Angels church, holding onto what dignity that she could. Seeing the tattooed priest locking the doors, she begged for a few minutes.

"I am actually on my way to a sanctuary, Miss McCall. You look like you need to get away, how about I give you a ride to there. It is a place of quiet contemplation."

Feeling safe, she followed him out to the sedan and got into the back seat like he suggested. "Try to get some sleep, Miss McCall."

Looking back at the woman, Mateo aka Manny knew that the time for vengeance was finally here. When his brother had died in his place, he had taken to the church, finding solace in the word of god. He likes the biblical way of doing things. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a life for a life.

Sam McCall had been wrecking havoc in too many lives and in order for Manny to finally come full circle and accept his knew vocation, he had to make amend to his only true innocent victim, Elizabeth Webber.

"Wakey wakey, Sammy!"

Sam woke up to find herself tied to a tree and could only hear the sound of the priest's voice. "Why are you doing this?

"You don't even know what I am doing. See I would kill you, but that would be too quick. So instead I am going to maim you just a bit." Next Sam felt a sharp pain in her pelvis area and then another and another. Screaming her head off, she finally passed out from the pain.

Untying her, Father Mateo made the call to 911. "I need assistance. I am at the old homeless shelter, behind it there are some rail cars. There is a woman here, Sam McCall. She is badly hurt. She is bleeding from her abdomen. Hurry, please!"

With that he took satisfaction from the three short arrows that were sticking out of her reproductive organs. When Mac arrived, he sighed. This was his third crime scene of the day that was connected to Sam McCall.

"Father Mateo, why were you out here."

"One of our parishioners; came to mass. He confessed to doing something. I was going to verify the truth before calling you, Father Coates can vouch for me if you think it is necessary, but in that open rail car you will find the money from the bank robbery on 12th street yesterday."

"What about Miss McCall?" he asked.

"She was tied to that tree when I arrived, she seemed confused. She thought I was my brother and fought with me when I tried to get her down."

"Thank you Father." Said Mac as he called Raynor and let him know about the money. Seeing the note, he sighed and called Alexis telling her about the bank money and that Sam had been hurt again. "There is a note, it's in Russian."

Hurrying to GH, Nik listened to Alexis' plea and said fine, but only until she is well. "I don't trust your daughter."

Sam woke up to see Kelly Lee standing at the foot of her bed. "You will be happy to know that the arrows didn't puncture your wound. You should know in a week if you are pregnant."

Wanting to scream again, she just demanded that Epiphany who had entered call Mac or another police officer. "I am afraid they are all busy Miss McCall, there has been a rash of accidents. Lucky Spencer was killed by a waste truck, Sonny's death; I understand you were there for that one."

Gnashing her teeth, Sam got up gingerly and got dressed trying not to tear the stitches that Robin had sown up on her. She was soon feeling sick as she crossed the river to Spoon Island with Nik and a nameless launch pilot.

In the room he allotted her in an upper tower, Sam took of the dressing and looked at her wound and swore vengeance on Robin. She had used the thread to monogram initials on her. EWM, there where three small marks on her with Elizabeth effing Webber's new name.

Getting up and stomping up the stairs after her cousin, she carefully approached him. The last time they had been up on this parapet he had tried to toss her over before coming to his senses.

"We need to talk when you are well." He said shortly.

"About what?" she asked.

"Your relationship with my brother for one. Just how much of that was to get Morgan back? See Lucky is chasing after Rebecca and I have no intention of losing another woman to him."

"Who was the first?" she asked leaning against the warm stone and closing her eyes.

"Elizabeth, though I got over my crush quick enough. Now will you help me?"

"With what?" she asked opening her eyes and realizing she couldn't see him.

Turning she saw he was in the corner looking across the harbor at the Towers. Repeating her question, she was surprised to realize he wanted her to seduce Lucky away from Rebecca.

"What do I get if I help you?"

"In exchange for telling everything you did, I will get you everything you deserve from Morgan." He said with a cold smile.

Sam returned the look, glad to see that that prince was as down and dirty as the rest of the male population.

"Here, sit down, I know you have had a rough day."

Sam sat on the high bar stool, and then asked where it came from.

"When I first moved here, I would sit here with my uncle dangling my legs over in a fit of daring to prove I was a true Cassidine and not scared of anything." He said challenging her to prove that now.

Doing what he had told her, Sam started to tell him her version of events, from taunting Jason to what had happened the night of the ball with the truth about Jake coming out.

When she was finished, ending with the way she had been the behind the scenes person for the second kidnapping of Jake Morgan, she asked Nik when he was going to help her get Morgan.

"Here, take this." He said handing her the snaking saddle rope that he had been braiding while they talked. "I only have a few more inches to go, so wrap it around your wrist."

Sam did what he said then asked why he was repairing it himself.

"That is what my job is, as head of the family, to solve problems for my family. To do whatever is necessary for them to live a safe and scandal free life." With that he said "Do you know what I think you deserve from Morgan."

"What?" she said with a smile that turned into a scream as he looped the rope through a wrought iron loop and shoved her off the side and left her dangling by the arm.

"Absolutely nothing!" he said with a grin over the side as he touched the rope. "You are a worthless piece of trash and I hope when your body washes up they find that your DNA isn't a match to Alexis'. See, you used my brother; screwed him up even more than he already was. He died today, because of your antics at the hospital."

Sam felt the stretching and tearing of her shoulder muscles as she tried to hold on when Nik stopped talking she shouted. "That all happened because of Elizabeth. You have to realize that, she is the reason Lucky is dead."

"No she isn't. Elizabeth has been one of my truest friends, mine and Emily's. So for Emily's sake, I am ending this longstanding problem in my family."

With that Nik took the sword he had gotten back recently from the PCPD and cut Sam loose enjoying her screams as she fell to the dark and forbidding water below while debating what to give Jason and Elizabeth as a wedding present.

Monica was tired as she drove home from a double shift at GH and seeing a shadow out at the boathouse, drove down toward what she believed to be Michael. Seeing the drenched and barely standing Sam McCall, she sped up and hit the woman she knew had set out to destroy her son's life.

Hearing the thump she called Diane Miller and said "I think I just did a very bad thing."

"Dr. Quartermaine, what is it?"

"I thought I saw someone breaking into the boathouse, when I sped down there, I hit something in the driveway. When I checked I saw that it was Sam McCall."

Groaning, Diane made sure an ambulance was on the way then called Mac Scorpio who was listening to his daughter's shrill explanation as to why Spinelli was now staying in Georgie's old room.

"Who was that again?" Listening, he nodded at each pause, then said "I will meet the ambulance at the hospital."

"Dad what is it?"

"Sam McCall was in another accident. She was caught breaking into the Quartermaine boathouse and Monica hit her with her car as she fled."

Sam woke up to a bright light being shined in her eyes as Matt Hunter asked if she was seeing one finger or two. Groaning she said weakly "One."

"Fine, but I would like you to stay here tonight." He said then looking at the clock with both fingers pointing to the up position, "Or rather this morning."

"I can't, someone is trying to kill me."

"Do you want me to call your mother?" he asked not taking her too seriously.

"NO!" she shouted then held her head from buzzing sound it caused in her inner eardrums.

Waiting until the doctor had left, Sam snuck out of her room and was at the door when she saw Claudia Zachara walking out the door.

"You, you are the reason my husband is dead. YOU WHORE!" shouted the Italian when she saw Sam.

"You ha…." There was the sound of a whistle then nothing but two bodies hitting the ground. The ER staffed rushed over and saw that both bodies were oozing blood and finding no pulse Robin declared them DOA.

"Call Alexis and I guess, Johnny Zachara."

Sam woke up lying in their bed at the penthouse. Calling out for Jason, she tried to shake away the horrible nightmare she had had. Like she would sleep with Ric Lansing or that Jason would EVER be attracted to Elizabeth Webber.

Getting dressed, she saw that all her clothes were still hanging in her closet, nothing was missing and she was wearing the star necklace Jason had given her the night before.

Calling out again when she got no answer, she just shrugged and looking at the clock, decided to order some Chinese food and took the bridal magazine she had hidden in the top drawer of her dresser to head downstairs and sit on the sofa until Jason returned.

Arriving at the landing, she stopped, wondering what happened to all the nice furniture. All there was down there was a large leather sofa, a desk and a pool table.

Walking around the room, she saw a piece of paper taped to the wall and went to grab the note, hoping there was a good explanation for all this. She froze when she read what the note said:

Mrs. Dr. Steven Hardy (Audrey)

&

Drs. Alan and Monica Quartermaine

Have requested your presence at

the wedding of

Elizabeth Imogene Webber

&

Jason Morgan Quartermaine

To take place at

Queen of Angels RC church

On December 24th 2002

At the sound of keys in the door, Sam turned to see Elizabeth with short hair being picked up and pinned to the door by Jason as he kissed her and slowly undressed her carrying her up the stairs, ignoring Sam's frantic screams.

"They can't hear you." Said the annoying blond who was filing her nails.

Turning she looking at Courtney and said "What are you doing here?"

"Thanks to all the trouble you cause, they are getting a do-over. The new PTB decided that the last several years never happened. Jason and Elizabeth got a second chance and you aren't even a memory or a really bad feeling of déjà vu."

"From that date, I doubt he remembers you either."

Sighing the blond leaned against the pool table and said "He never met me; a very bossy man by the name of Guza showed up at my mother's place in Atlantic City and erased me from existence with the help of the Sopranos. He gave my file a computer virus so that his boss Mr. Frons never saw me or my manly arms and legs."

Sam just stared then said "You are crazier than a loon."

"No, there are a lot of us here. A woman named Claudia, a con artist named Rebecca and her partner who is not Luke Spencer's son. Lulu Spencer, at least the boring, whiny version. Carly #1, #3, and #4."

The last one ended up here when she slept with Sonny in a limo after Michael's hockey game where he ended up in a coma. Poor Carrot top."

Sam just sat down, then said "Who else?"

"Basically anyone involved with whitewashing your character. Your handicapped brother, your mean parents. Your abusive ex, the girl who looked like you and her mother."

"Why couldn't I live?"

Diego Alcazar walked into the room and said "By killing you off, they were able to save more important people, Audrey Hardy didn't become a car horn. Emily Q and Georgie Jones weren't killed in a lame ass serial killer story. Alan Q is alive and kicking."

"How is all of that my fault?" she pouted.

"Because you're a waste of peoples' time and money." Said the patient young man. "Now be a good girl and die, going quietly into the night.

Sam died and they all lived happily ever after.

PS: Jason and Elizabeth moved into their dream house, a simple home with lots of bedrooms and a pool table. There was also room in the garage for two bikes and on the top floor there was an atrium flooded with light where the now famous artist works when they are not visiting Italy with their family.

Carly #2 ran off with Lorenzo Alcazar. Brenda is still married to Jax and Sonny found he had an incurable STD that caused a certain body part to fall off meaning that his friends and family never had to deal with another one of his whiny spawn again and Olivia discovered that Asa Buchanan was her son Dante's father and she ran off with his bitter enemy Todd Manning.

Georgie got tired of Maxie's shenanigans and had her parents ship her off to a convent where they practiced complete silence. Spinelli never came to town, so Jason never lost his brains and successfully ran his organization with the help of Johnny O'Brien and Francis Corelli.

Cooper was Brenda's brother, Logan was Scott's son, but with Laura, since Genie Francis wanted revenge for the Ethan as Luke's story.

Jake and Cameron were born right on schedule, but Lila and her twin sister Audrey just had to be early. They wanted to join in on driving their parents up the wall and knew that no matter their birth date, they would be soras anyhow.

The end, or until the next bottle of wine!


End file.
